Tip #18: If you battle it, stand up and fight!

I am a food addict. If you haven't realized it yet, I don't struggle with 10-15 lbs creeping their way onto my body. Nope, I'm a full-fledged food-aholic. Food is my drug and has been ever since I can remember. It makes me happy when I'm sad. It makes me happier when I'm happy. I vividly remember all of my favorite food memories growing up. I remember getting rewarded with a DQ Blizzard after every orthodontist appointment. I remember getting a DQ Blizzard after every aerobics work out. I remember eating an entire bag of chips and container of dip after a day of detassling corn. Food made it all better for me.

Year after year after year of turning to food to make it all better put one 10, 15, 30, 50 extra pounds on my body.

In 2006, I had a goal to lose 50 lbs.

In 2007 I completely and totally threw my hands in the air and said, "I'M DONE FIGHTING THIS BATTLE."

Throughout the course of the following year after "giving up" - I gained another 40 lbs.

In December 2008, I had a goal to lose 90 lbs.

Guess what I've learned..... I will ALWAYS have a battle to fight with regards to my weight. Some of you may always have a battle to fight. That's the bad news.

Here's the good news. We CAN fight this battle and we CAN win this battle!!!!!! I had to decide whether I wanted to fight and win... or give up and lose. Either way the battle will always be there for me. There will always be two outcomes. I'm either losing and therefore gaining weight... or I'm winning and losing weight and getting fit and healthy.

I've accepted the fact that I will always have to fight this battle. Having lost 86 lbs I've realized that IT'S WORTH THE FIGHT!!!!!!

If you fight the same battles, take heart!! You CAN win the battle and believe me... every bit of fight is worth the end result of losing weight and keeping it off!!

So stand up and FIGHT!!!! You are worth it!!!

Tip #17: It WILL get easier.

The first several months of my weight loss journey were SUPER hard!!! So many hard choices to make going against my human nature of wanting to eat whatever I want whenever I want! Very little physical changes. Very few people notice any changes. Headaches from giving up or cutting back on caffinated drinks. Walking this road is HARD. Plain and simple. But I have good news for you!!! IT GETS EASIER!! Not easy, but easier!!!

Firstly, the more weight you lose the more you get to experience new and wonderful things such as shopping for clothes in a smaller size, compliments from family and friends, feeling more comfortable in clothes, enjoying exercise, etc. You will eventually experience all of these wonderful things. When you do, it is these very things that motivate you to press on down this path of lighter living.

Today, I needed to eat something on my way home from work before my training session. I stopped at the gas station which is a very dangerous place for me to stop. In my previous life, I used to stop by the gas station every single night on the way home from work and binge on Mountain Dew, ice cream bars, Jays BBQ potato chips, and candy bars. So you would think for me to step back in a gas station would be risky business. But guess what, I was not one bit tempted to binge out like I used to. I got a water and a travel pack of peanuts. That's it. I left that gas station with the biggest smile on my face.

It's getting easier!!!

Press on down this path. The payoffs are REMARKABLE and while it may always be a challenge to make the right food choices, it WILL get easier!!!!

Tip #16: The "IT" factor!

What is it that makes you say "No thank you" to the second helping of dessert?

What is it that makes you spend a grueling hour with a personal trainer after you've worked all day and spent 1 1/2 hours on the road?

What is it that makes you choose water over your favorite beverage?

What is it that makes you get up before work to exercise?

What is it for you?

My husband reminded me of mine this weekend. We went to church and then to Mancino's afterwards for lunch. I had a training session awaiting me after lunch. I said to Josh while eating (and really wanting to take a nap), "Why on earth did I schedule a training session on a Sunday afternoon." Josh says, without missing a beat, "Because you want to look good in your bathing suit this summer." He said it so matter of factly! Instantly my light bulb went off. I responded, "Oh yeah, that's right!" And along I went to training session.

What is "it" for you?

There HAS to be something. The "it factor" MUST exist or you will not make hard choices to eat different and exericse!!

The "it factor" changed for me throughout the course of the year. It started out as wanting to be a certain size for my daughter's birthday party. I ended up in the hospital that day for kidney stones, but hey I looked better at 40 lbs lighter! Then it was our trip to Kings Island and my desire to fit comfortably in the seats. Then it was the Blueberry Festival. Througout the months, the "it factor" may have been a certain shirt or outfit I've had my eye on.

Right now, the "it factor" is wanting to look better in a bathing suit. The crazy thing is..... I didn't think looking better in a bathing suit was ever possible. I'm learning that I MUST sacrifice now, to get what I want later!!

Identify the "it factor" for you.... and focus on that. Right it down, hang it up, leave yourself notes and pictures - whatever it takes to keep that somethin' somethin' at the forefront of your mind at all times. Doing this will make the world of difference. This I truly believe!

Tip #15: Don't fly solo!

Hold the phone. Did I not just say in "Tip #14" to FLY SOLO? I'm sure you're wondering why on earth I would now tell you to NOT fly solo!! Allow me to explain. In my previous tip, I encouraged you NOT to help others until YOU yourself have become stronger in your journey. There is one person who can help you that will not zap you of the precious energy you NEED to stay on the path of lighter living. That person is Jesus Christ!

Personal true story. Eleven years ago, I was at an all time low with regards to constantly being defeated in this "battle of the bulge." I was literally out of control with my eating. I had tried everything. I was truly at my wits end. Like many people who have hit rock bottom in whatever area they struggle with in life, I cried out to God for help! I knew that overcoming this stronghold was going to take a power much bigger than myself. In March 1999, during a Walk to Emmaus weekend retreat, I experienced the love of Christ like never before!! I asked Him to come live in my heart and I asked Him to be Lord over my life! I surrendered my life, once and for all. I simply cannot explain the tranformation that immediately began to take place in my life.

At this point, you might be asking yourself, "Well, if Jesus began a transformation in you eleven years ago, why are you just now losing the weight." GOOD QUESTION! And honestly, I've asked myself this question for 10 years, "God, if my weight struggles is what brought me closer to You, why have I yet to overcome them?" To be truthful, throughout the past years- I heard only silence to that question. However, in looking back at this past year.... and in looking back over the ten years prior... I see that I had a lot to learn about Him and about myself.

God tells me in the bible that He WANTS to help carry my burdens. He tells me sin has no power over me. He says that His ways are higher than my ways. He reassures me that He will never leave me or forsake me. He tells me that He has great plans for me... plans to prosper me and not to harm me. He says that He works all things out for the good of those who love Him. But here's the deal. I HAVE TO BELIEVE WHAT HE IS TELLING ME!!!!! Until I believe it and claim it as truth in my heart and soul, God's power is powerless to me.

In December 2008, I decided to believe His words and apply them to my lifelong stronghold with my weight. And guess what happened..... my belief led me to take action.... and His power kicked in gear like I never knew was possible!! In 2009, I've had an INCREDIBLY stressful year with work challenges that have far exceeded anything I've faced before - as well as health challenges that rocked my world. God's strength came through for me in my time of weakness. That's how God works. When we surrender everything to Him and acknowledge that we can do all things through CHRIST who strengthens us.... THEN.... THEN we can overcome anything!!! ANYTHING!!!!

So beloved friends, don't fly solo - at least not completely solo. Jesus Christ loves you and He wants to help you every step of the way!!! I could not fight this battle by myself. I've tried for more years than I care to admit. I believe I'll always have a battle to fight because of my own personal struggles with food. Fighting the battle with God by my side is the only way I will have lifelong victory.

Don't fly solo!

Tip #14: Fly solo!

Ok, this tip is going to be a little strange. I've always heard it's best to partner up with someone while on a weight loss journey. That way you have accountability... it's more fun when you've got someone to workout with.... you're not feeling so alone.... etc. I'm about to share a tip that is contrary to everything we've ever heard about partnering up with a friend.

Fly solo.

I have tried to lose weight throughout the years. I've ALWAYS joined forces with a friend. But what happens when I join up with a friend is that I end up encouraging them and literally using all of my energy to help them succeed! That's just me - my natural tendency is to give everything I have to help my friends overcome their struggles. The problem with that in this particular case? I didn't have any energy left for myself. It took 15 years to figure this one out. After 15 years of pairing up and failing.... I finally realized that FIRST, I must focus my energy on fighting MY battle. THEN - I will be able to help others. This was key I tell you... KEY to not commit and dedicate myself to helping someone else on their weight loss when I needed so much help myself! In fact, throughout the course of the journey I've had people say they were going to start on their own weight loss journey. Normally, I would jump on that train and offer my accountability, time, and mentorship. I can remember numerous conversations with Josh, telling him how much I wanted to help "so and so" get started on their journey, and he would always remind me ... "Not yet Tara! You've got to focus on YOU right now!" That literally went against everything in me, but I see now why it was ever-so important!! So resist the temptation to save yourself AND the world!! (ha) You are going to need every bit of energy and focus for yourself as you resist the daily temptations you will face! Rest assured, when you are stronger, God will use you to help others!!!!

Tip #13: Few may notice at first!

Oh, sharing this tip makes my heart a bit sad as I remember how hard it was for me when many friends, family and co-workers did not acknowledge my initial weight loss!! In fact, it was six months before most of my co-workeres had noticed I lost 5o lbs! Yes, I would get an occasional compliment regarding a new shirt.... but I can't recall many compliments about my weight loss. If you haven't experienced this "let down"... you might. All I can is - hold tight to the truth. The truth is that you've worked hard and your hard work is paying off. You're losing weight. The scale says it. The "every 10 lbs loss" picture says it. Your spouse is saying it and hopefully at least one good friend is saying it. Hold tight to those words. Not everyone understands what an incredible struggle saying "no" to food can be. And because of this, not everyone will think to encourage and compliment your victories. I've gotta tell you that after losing that 50 lbs, I was showered with love, encouragement and compliments - every where I turned. I felt sooooooo blessed! My cup was overflowing!!! (still is!!) So hang in there, hold tight to the victories you KNOW you've accomplished and stick close to your closests family and friends who encourage you daily!!! BELIEVE IT! YOU ARE DOING IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Seriously? I have my very own blog?

Today is a big day my friends. At the "encouragement"of my sister-in-law, I have created my very own blog. I've received great feed back about "Tara's Tips for Lighter Living" and I thought utilizing a blog may be a better location to place my "tips!"

Hope you enjoy and most of all I hope my tips help you on your journey to lighter living!!

Tip #12: Be patient!

Be patient. Oh I know I know, I've heard how the saying goes, "You didn't put the weight on overnight, so don't plan on taking it off over night." YADA YADA YADA! How many of you after the first of the year said, "I can't believe how fast 2009 went!!!" Or how many have said, "This summer has flown by!" You know what I'm talking about. Time flies and that is just a fact. Believe me, when you're on this journey of losing weight, TIME FLIES!!!!! It does not seem like I lost 82 lbs in 2009, it just doesn't! Time went so fast and it will go fast for you too. Try to be patient and remember that you are making lifestyle changes! So even if you were to lose the weight faster, you still need to maintain these healthier habits forever so there is really no point in time going faster than it already is. ENJOY THE JOURNEY!!! :)

Tip #11: Go shopping! Yes - go shopping!!!!

Buy new clothes as soon as your current clothes become too big. OHHHHH, I can't stress this tip enough!! This was key key key for me. Many people do not want to buy new clothes throughout the course of their weight loss journey because they think that either (a) they are settling for that size, when really they want to lose even more or (b) they think "Why would I want to spend the money on new clothes when I'm going to keep losing weight and therefore only where that item a few times!" Let me tell ya..... for me, I NEEEEEEEDED motivation (and still do!). I needed something to remind me that all of my hard work was in fact worth it. If you're losing weight but still wearing the bigger clothes, you're not going to SEEEEEEEE the difference. As I've said before, I personally need to SEEEE the difference to motivate me to stay on the path. This is another thing that you want to get the support of your spouse on as you will be spending a great deal of money on new clothes. Josh was 100% on board. In fact, I recall his encouragement in the first 2-3 months. He could see that discouragement was ovecoming me. He suggested we take a tirp up to Lane Bryant to pick out two shirts that I LOVED but in one size smaller than I was currently wearing. He knows me so well!! I found two shirts I loved (one size too small), brought them home, put them in my closet and in TWO WEEKS I was wearing them!! It did WONDERS for my spirits and was just what I needed to get over my discouragement hump. So add "Clothes Fund" to your budget right now so you can be prepared to buy yourself some new clothes at least every month of your journey. Losing about 10 lbs puts you in a smaller clothes size! As you are growing "out" of the new clothes you just purchased, look around and find a friend who could wear the nearly brand new clothes you just purchased. It will feel sooooooooooooooo great to bless someone with your nearly-new clothes! As you think about the money it will take to purchase new clothes, remember one very important thing - YOU ARE WORTH IT!!!!!!!!

Tip #10: Weigh and record once a week!

Record your weight weekly. One thing that helped me about going to Weight Watchers was the fact that I knew that every single Monday night I was going to step on the scale and that weight would be recorded. Yes, I weigh myself every morning - but knowing that Monday was the BIG day that my weight would "count" made all the difference. At first, I greatly disliked the fact that the WW class was on Monday. But I gotta tell ya that knowing I had to weigh in on Monday made me think twice before overindulging on the weekend!! If you're not using a resource where you would weigh in once a week, pick a day and pick a friend to "report" to. I truly believe this is so important!!! And be choosy about the friend you select. I personally do not recommend choosing your spouse. Why? Your spouse is going to love you NO MATTER WHAT! Josh has always been my #1 supporter, but I always knew that he'd love and forgive me of my shortcomings no matter what. I needed someone who was going to give me tough love! That person was my friend and WW leader, Shannon Roots! She not only had been down this journey before, but she also cared so much about me that she was willing to give me some tough lovin' if it meant keeping me on the path of lighter living. I'm soooooooo thankful for her! So put some serious thought into who that "special" person could be in your life. Sit down with that person, share your heart, share your goals and share how they might be able to help you in your journey. Make a commitment to this person to weigh in once a week and report your weight. Let this "chosen one" know how they can help you. Yes, YOU have to lose the weight and make the lifelong changes yourself BUT I believe we were created for fellowship..... to lean on one another... to lift one another up.... to encourage. We NEEEEEED each other (just like Sanctus Real says) and now is the time for you to lean on someone so that you can succeed and live your life to the fullest!!!!

Tip #9: Set goals!

Set goals - long term and short term. I used to always read that "tip" and roll my eyes. Setting goals never used to help me for some reason. But THIS time around, they were everything to me. I wouldn't just set a goal to lose 15 pounds by a certain month. Instead, I would identify an EVENT that I wanted to lose a certain amount of weight by. For instance, I wanted to lose 50 lbs by the time I went to King's Island. I wanted desperately to ride the rollar coasters comfortably!!! In addition, I wanted to be able to buy some smaller clothes to wear on my trip. I focused on that goal soooooo much. Everytime I was tempted to overindulge, I would think about my goal and remind myself that if I do in fact overindulge, I will not meet my goal!!! After reaching that goal, I identified other events that could continue to motivate me!! Think about what is coming up in your life where you would LOVE to sport a new outfit in a smaller size! Mark in on the calendar. I lost on the average of 2 lbs/week. Get the calendar out, find the event/date you're striving for and figure out your weight loss goal based on a maximum of an average of 2 lbs for week!!! Just like you would map out your vacation travels - you need to map out this weight loss journey!! Once you do that, reaching your "goal weight" will not be nearly as daunting as you originally thought!!! You'll see that it is COMPLETELY possible AND in a much shorter time frame than you may have originally thought!!!

Tip #8: A picture is worth a thousand words!

Be sure to take pictures of yourself at every 10 lbs lost. This helped me soooooo much! The first twenty pounds I couldn't see a different in the pictures; however when I lost 30 lbs and every 10 lbs thereafter the pictures showed a HUGE difference. There were days when I didn't "feel" like I was losing weight. Very few people noticed my weight loss which discouraged me greatly. Josh would then turn my attention to my "before" picture and compare it to my 30 lb loss picture and he would say, "SEE, can't you see the difference??" Pictures don't lie and even though I wasn't "feeling" good about the weight I had lost, the pictures always guided me back to reality!! I keep a little photo holder in my purse and carry it with me wherever I go. It contains several "before" pictures as well as a picture of me at least 10 lb loss. It is a wonderful reminder of how far I've come and how much I NEVER want to return!!! It reminds me of how my hard work HAS paid off and I can't tell you how many times those pictures have helped me to say "NO!!" to overindulging!!! Side note: It's super fun to post the pictures on Facebook!!! I didn't post mine until I lost 30 lbs... and I posted them with GREAT hesitation. However, I was encouraged by friends to post them and it was THE BEST thing I ever did. The encouragement I received from my FB friends while on this journey in 2009 meant everything to me!!!!!

Tip #7: Eat what you like to eat, just eat less of it!

Eat what you normally eat, just eat less of it! The only two food items I limit as much as possible is pizza and fried chicken. Anytime I have eaten any one of those (even if just one piece of pizza or one piece of fried chicken), I would see a slight gain on the scale for that week's weigh in. Both of those are soooooo high in calories and points. Otherwise, I just eat half as much of all the normal food I used to eat. Often times, Josh and I will split a meal when we go out to eat. Or I will eat half of my meal when I eat our for lunch. It's like a game to me, to see how much I can leave behind. I'm not one to bring home leftovers, so when I leave it behind - I really leave it behind. I'm ok with it though because I figured I'd rather leave it behind than leave it on my BEE-HIND!!! haha I used to drink five cans of Mountain Dew each day, now I drink one can and that's how I've rolled with the Dew all year. This "habit" has allowed me to enjoy most all of my very favorite foods, yet still lose weight. My friend and WW leader Shannon used to say, "Don't give anything up that you're not willing to give up the rest of your life." I took that to heart because I have chosen not to give ANY food up!! I know me too well. The minute I tell myself I can't have something, then I'll WANT it in a bad way! ha So... consider cutting your portion sizes in half when you eat your favorite foods that you THOUGHT you'd have to give up!!! Enjoy every morsel of your smaller portion and watch as the weight comes off!!!

Tip #6: STOP - until you're hungry!

Do not put one morsel of food in your mouth unless your stomach is growling!! This tip is probably thee second most important KEY in my weight loss this past year. This involves realllllllly listening to your body's signals regarding hunger. To this day (and hopefully the rest of my life), I do not eat ANYTHING unless my stomach is hollow and hungry! ha It's like I can just envision my stomach truly empty, needing to be filled. If I'm not hungry I don't eat, period. This habit really comes in handy on days where I enjoy a larger-than-normal meal out at a restaurant or family gathering. Most times, if I have a large meal at lunch I am truly not hungry for another meal for supper. My stomach may start growing at bedtime so I just have a piece of string cheese to tide me over until breakfast the next day! Plus, food tastes SO MUCH BETTER when you're eating it while very very hungry!!!! I'm a food lover to the core, and I've never enjoyed my food so much as I have this year. A bit ironic, for sure!

Tip #5: Food budget

It's super important to have a "budget" of sorts when it comes to how much food you should be eating and how much food you really ARE eating. It's very similiar to a financial budget. You wouldn't go through life just spending money on anything and everything you wanted without making sure you had enough money set aside for bills, food, gas, etc... right?? Can you imagine "accidentally" spending all of your money for the month and not having any left for food for your family (assuming you have no credit cards)? The same concept is true with regards to eating. If you go through life eating whatever you want, having no clue the caloric cost of that food, then you will continue to gain weight and be overweight. It's imperative that you have a budget with your eating just like you have a budget for your money! And just like budgeting with money, you CAN still enjoy spending on fun things you enjoy - but only if you are a good steward with your money. Similiarly, you can eat foods you enjoy - but only if you are a good steward with your food choices throughout the week!!!

Weight Watchers uses a "point system" by which every type of food has a points value attached to it. The points value is calculated by using the number of calories, grams of fat and grams of fiber for each food. You are given the number of points you can eat each day in order to lose weight - this amount is based on your current height, weight, current activity level, etc.. As you lose weight, the number of points you can consume a day is reduced by one point (DARN!). If you chose not to do Weight Watchers, I would suggest counting calories. There are many amazing websites that tell you how many calories you should be consuming if you are trying to lose weight. These websites also contain a HUGE database for the number of calories associated with each food - even restaurant food! I encourage you to choose a method by which to become knowledgable about the "cost" of each food you are putting in your mouth. In addition, become knowledgable about how much you should be eating in order to lose weight. Then commit to tracking this every single day to ensure you are not overeating!! It's the worth the time and it's worth the effort!!! This was THE NUMBER ONE KEY to my weight loss!!!

Tip #4: Focus on one change at a time.

As you begin making losing weight and getting health a priority in your life, don't overdo it with many changes all at once. If you're choosing to focus on weight loss with the help of a weight loss program such as Weight Watchers (or whichever program you have chosen), don't overwhelm yourself with following ALL of the guidelines in that program. For instance, regular exercise is a key component for losing weight with Weight Watchers. At 246 lbs, it was EXTREMELY difficult to exercise. In fact, I can recall walking at a very slooooooow speed on my treadmill at home in January 2009. Even though I was walking slow, I literally thought I was going to die of a heart attack within 3 minutes. That is just how out of shape I was!!! I decided very quickly that I was not going to exercise until I lost some weight. I KNEW ME..... and I knew that if I tried to follow every single recommendation/guideline of the program all at once, I would fail!!! So I choose to forgo the exercise portion of the program for a time.... and focus on cutting back portion sizes instead (more on that later). I lost 50 lbs in six months without exercising!!! YEP - I said it.... 50 lbs with NO EXERCISE!!!!! So don't over do it, especially in the beginning. You don't have to make a zillion changes all at once to lose weight. Concentrate on the aspect of the program that you CAN do.... and focus

Tip #3: Pick a resource.

Tip #3: When you have decided that you truly ARE ready for a lifestyle change and you have received the financial go-ahead from your spouse - decide which resource you will start with. In my experience, starting with one resource at a time is important. To hire a nutritionist and a personal trainer and join the gym and join a weight loss program is TOO MUCH!! I know me too well. To rely on more than one resource in the beginning would send me straight down the path of failure. So I chose Weight Watchers. I had joined once before AND a good friend of mine was currently a leader of a WW class in Rochester. I naturally started with the "I'M READY" phone call to her and since that time in December 209, I attended approximately 40 Monday night meetings. Yep, it's a financial ($40/month) AND a time commitment. That was one less evening I got to spend with my family... and considering I already wasn't able to spend two other weekday-evenings with them, the commitment was harder than I ever imagined. BUT, if you ask Josh and Hailey if they regret me being gone all those Monday nights - they would say NO WAY.... because they got their mom/wife back!!!!!

Tip #2: Talk about it!

Tip #2: Once you have decided that you are ready to turn down the path of healthier living, talk to your spouse about it. It's sooooooo important to have 100% support from your spouse. Right now, I'm speaking of the financial support for the resources you will NEED to help you be successful. For me it made the world of different when Josh said to me one year ago, "Whatever resources you need (i.e. a nutrionist, a personal trainer, a weight loss program, exercise equipment for home, etc.) you will have!!!" That was HUGE because I didn't want to be a financial burden to my family. I encourage you to talk openly and honestly about your weight struggles and desire to make THE change down the path of lighter living. To have your spouse's agreement and support for resources to make your journey a success is KEY!!

Tip #1: Are you reallllllllly sick and tired of being sick and tired?

Tips #1: Are you reallllllllly sick and tired of being sick and tired? So much so that you're ready give up your daily (maybe even hourly) overindulgences to eat whenever you want, whatever you want? The first step on this journey is making a decision to live the rest of your life without giving in to those daily/hourly desires to overindulge. For many many years I was sick and tired of being sick and tired, but I was NOT ready to give up eating whenever I wanted whatever I wanted. It wasn't until December 2008 that I knew in my heart I was ready to give up giving into those desires.... and start moving ahead towards a new healthier life that involved me making different choices!! Are you reallllly ready? Be honest with yourself!!!

Introducing.... "Tara's Tips for Lighter Living"

For the next several weeks, I'm going to be posting "Tara's Tips for Lighter Living." As I reflect back on 2009, I am amazed at how my life has changed since making the decision to change my lifestyle and lose the excess weight once and for all. I've lost 86 lbs starting in January 2009 through today, January 13th, 2010. People ask me often "How did you do it?" I can't sum it up with just a sentence or two, so I thought I'd share the MANY MANY things that helped me lose the weight and gain my AMAZING life back! I hope these "tips" encourage you! Remember my very favorite quote... "She believed she could, so she did." Brothers and sistas, you CAN do this if you choose!!!